You’re Ready. You’re Set. What Are You Waiting For?
Ever heard a divorced woman say she regrets leaving her unhealthy marriage, 3 years after leaving? Ever heard “the new guy” at work say he regrets leaving his old job, which he hated during the entire 5 year career? How often have you heard a 30-something year old graduate express even an ounce of remorse for the 4 year period of intense study, isolation, and lack of financial luxuries, after having earned the degree?
If your memory-based research is anything like mine, your answer is… never. I cannot recall a time I’ve heard a person regret having made the (hard) decision after it was made and the associated outcomes, lived.
It’s interesting though, because we often operate from a place that tells us this particular decision is so hard and life-changing that the sky may fall, the earth might shatter and every coffee house within an 80mile radius could burn down, never to brew medium roast hazelnut again! We make ourselves comfy in knowing what to expect, even though we expect it to suck.
Comfort is a cold piece of work.
I mean really, we dream only to complain, (over)process and seek feedback, solace and “healthy” tequila recipes for a month of happy hours instead of activating our “go” button, climbing the mountain, or taking a running-leap on the Faith that we so pride ourselves on having.
Mm hm.
And yes, OK fine, it is possible that I might’ve won the decision-making-procrastinator “Planny” Award, preferring to first inspect every single atom of each mineral in all the rocks of the same mountain, umpteen times before even considering what shoes I might wear in case I do decide to climb. And guess what happens during all that damn inspecting? I confuse myself! Wait, why do I want to climb this mountain again? Why am I standing here? Maybe I should collect rocks!
An Imam who once counseled me during an “I’m still not sure” phase said, Confusion is knowing what you must do, and not doing it.
Daaamn. The NERVE, right?!
The truth is, the amount of LIFE that deferred decision-making sucks from our core is tremendous. Exhorbitant. Kinda stupid, really. I mean we read, post and quote all of these affirmations of joy, love and success, but want the road to be straight, the climb effortless, and the weather, a breezy 74.
And of course, I’m not suggesting you leave your current situation before you’ve given your absolute best and learned a few things. And I’m not advising you to not practice gratitude for every person, thing and experience – even the miserable ones – that have ushered you into this very moment. You get that, right? I’m not saying we should make life-altering decisions without reasonable consideration, deep prayer, excessive cussing, and yielding to some non-life-threatening vice real quick.
What I’m offering is, when Spirit whispers “now”, “it’s time”, or “chile please, are you still on this?”, you gotta do it. You gotta climb. You gotta know that it is your birthright to get to the mountaintop where healthy love, a passion-filled life, and all the other stuff on your Pinterest board lives.
But hey, don’t trust me or the Imam. Take the practical. Do what you know you must, on the clearest terms and with the clearest intentions. See if any confusion dissipates, if you find comfort (or something better) on the mountaintop. Go. The coffee house is still brewing. You will not self-destruct. You are geared with safeguarded equipment, the wisdom reminding you that hard, life-changing, scary decisions are the ones people do not regret making.*
*Disclaimer: This is not a safeguarded approach to mountain climbing.
Step up at your own risk.
~DelinaDream